Santa Claus, The Easter Bunny, and The Tooth Fairy

This post is specifically about Santa Claus, though I thought I should mention the other two, as they are in the same camp.  Although I must say that The Tooth Fairy is shockingly forgetful, and dare I say, incompetent . . .  Anyway, I was thinking today about the beginning of our homeschooling journey, now nearly 18 years ago, when we found ourselves in the midst of the Christian homeschooling movement.  There is a very long list of reasons as to why we never really "fit in" back then.  And while that list still exists, the difference is that we don't try to fit in any longer . . .

We'd been homeschooling (unschooling by this time, but shhhh . . .) for a little over a year when Christmas rolled around.  And more importantly, we had always perpetuated the myth of that Jolly Old Elf (Santa) in our home (heinous, I know).  It had never occurred to me that any of my kids' sweet new friends would tell them that, brace yourself, SANTA CLAUS IS NOT REAL.  We had hopped in our van after a homeschooling craft day at a friend's home, and my children dropped the bomb on me.  "So and so said that SANTA CLAUS IS NOT REAL!" 

Oh!  The shock.  The horror.  How was I to affect damage control?!?  At that moment, I had to tell my children the COLD, HARD TRUTH  . . .  "Those kids don't believe and so Santa will NOT be coming to their house on Christmas eve!  How sad for them . . ."  There.  Done.  And, of course, by the time Easter rolled around the following year, I was prepared.  "Those kids don't believe, so The Easter Bunny will NOT be hopping on over to their homes on Easter!  How sad for them . . ."

From that time on, as my children grew and dropped off the "believer" list, I made sure to remind them of how magical it was to believe in Santa, The Easter Bunny, and The Tooth Fairy (fraud), and that they should never burst the bubble of their younger siblings or any other child.  Sadly, all of my children are in the non-believing camp now  . . .  : (    I reminded my two youngest just the other day to remember the magic and to not spoil it for other kiddos . . .  : )

Parenting Ain't No Place for Sissies

I heard of homeschooling for the first time in a 1989 issue of Mothering Magazine.  I never even knew it existed before then.  When we decided to “try” homeschooling (which would morph into unschooling in our lives after about 3 weeks), I had never met, let alone spoken to, another homeschooler.  Eventually, after 5 months, my family would become connected with the local Christian homeschool support group, and so began our journey with other Christian homeschoolers. 

I was a newbie, both to homeschooling and to the politics that sometimes surrounds being a Christian.  Perhaps as a result of the behavior of my children?!, I was either given or had recommended to me a few different parenting books.  One in particular stands out in my mind as being quite disturbing to me at the time.  My husband and I would later have a “ceremonial burning” of that book in our campfire ring . . .  ; )  The authors recommended ways of discipline that my husband and I were absolutely not comfortable embracing.  But the most disturbing part was the narrative put forth that if Christian parents DIDN’T embrace those ways of discipline that they were going against scripture.  We rejected that narrative then, and we still reject it now.  I felt brave back then (albeit PRIVATELY brave), as we were definitely going against the tide of parenting/discipline beliefs of many of our closest homeschooling friends.  Back then, I wasn't necessarily completely honest about what I thought for fear of not "belonging".  What I know as truth now is that I shouldn't have been trying to belong . . . 

I’ve read many different Christian parenting books and articles on biblical parenting and discipline since then, and I am happy to say that my husband and I were not and are not the only Christians to reject the narrative found in that book all those years ago.  I’ve been parenting for nearly 24 years now and unschooling for over 17, and I still love to read books and articles on parenting, which leads me to one of the purposes of this post . . . 

I had heard of the book “Parenting Wild Things:  Embracing the Rumpus” (www.parentingwildthings.com) by Jessica Bowman (https://www.facebook.com/BohemianBowmans?ref=ts) several months ago and most recently read a review of the book by my friend, Tammy Metz.  I finally downloaded it onto my Kindle app today and read the entire thing while relaxing in hot bath . . .  It’s a great book on gentle and respectful parenting and is available today from Amazon for just $3.00 on pdf and $4.14 for Kindle.  Check it out!  You won’t be disappointed.

Extreme School Supply Shopping: In Which We Attempt to Dodge Inquiring Minds

Grace, Lirit and I went to Wal-mart two weeks ago to buy school supplies.  We love school supplies.  Who doesn't, right?!?  I don't know how it is where you live, but here, Wal-mart has a display in the front of the store housing papers containing lists of school supplies required to be purchased by parents for their child(ren)'s upcoming school year.  The lists are for specific grades within specific schools with specific school districts.  The fact that there isn't a piece of paper in the display labeled SPANISH PEAKS ACADEMY (the name of our little homeschool) is a source of mild frustration for my kiddies.  Anyway, those lists include items such as hand sanitizer and tissues, as well as what you would consider traditional school supplies.

I must admit to some trepidation when stepping into the school supply aisles . . .  While scanning the shelves and picking out "cool stuff" (since we don't have a government-mandated list), I am hoping that no one will ask any of the questions in the dreaded series of questions . . . What district are you in?  What school?  What GRADE are you going into? ~ Then, after we've answered these with D70, we homeschool, and dumbstruck looks from my kids who just wish I'd ASSIGN them a grade, ALREADY . . .   we hear, Really?  I could never homeschool. Is it hard? How much are you monitored by the government?  What curriculum do you use?  I have a friend who homeschools using ABEKA.  Have you ever considered cyber-school? ~ (Cue squirming and some uncomfortable silences) ~  Don't get me wrong.  Almost everyone is always VERY NICE, and I understand that they are curious.

It's just that this line of questioning puts me at odds with my inherent compulsion to always TELL THE TRUTH.  The curriculum question, if answered honestly, always leads to UNschooling?!?  What's that?  I've never heard of that!?  So, to be completely honest HERE, RIGHT NOW, I sometimes just say, umm . . .  we use various, er uh, curriculum items.  And since my nose is already beginning to grow, I answer the rest of the questions in the series with things like, yes, homeschooling isn't for everyone, and we fully comply with Colorado's homeschool law (that part's true, of course) and we've been homeschooling for 17 years, long before cyber-schooling came into existence, and it has worked very well for us, AKA, I have two full-grown, fully functional adult daughters.  Wanna see pictures?!? lol.  Sometimes it's just easier to tell people what they want to hear, ya know?!?  And once the school supplies go on clearance, it's really only homeschoolers that you'll find in those aisles . . .  And once the kids have been back in school for a few weeks, the line of questioning changes and comes from the check-out clerks . . .  What?  No school, today?  Anyway . . .

After our cart has enough markers, crayons, colored pencils, composition books (we decoupage the covers), Elmer's Glue-All and glue sticks for at least a few months, we stealthily make our way out of the school supply aisles and head over to the safety of the LEGO aisle.